6. The conspiracy-theory Vol
Much of UT’s lack of success over the past decade can be traced back to a carefully-executed plan done in conjunction between the media, the SEC, the NCAA, refs and even UT administrators. Dave Hart was sent in by Alabama to wreck UT’s athletic program. Jimmy Check? A well-placed spy from Florida who gives away all of UT’s secrets to the Gators. The SEC employs corrupt refs that make sure Alabama and Florida beats UT every season.
And the media? It’s obvious that they all hate the Vols and just want Alabama, Notre Dame, Ohio State and Michigan in the College Football Playoffs every year. The whole plan will be complete when Charles Woodson is named the Commissioner of College Football and has full scheduling rights, the only vote for the Heisman, power to decide the playoffs and makes UT start each game with negative-21 points.